Grrrrr

Going to a wedding is sometimes a total drain on me emotionally. I mean.. oh happy couples everywhere.....and me sitting by myself..... I kind of want to stop looking.... it's kind of hard and time consuming and I've got other things to be doing you know. I keep doing first date after first date, but nothing happens. Any of the ones that end up well are work-a-holics. I've done another phone purge recently. I have all these numbers from guys who I know will never call again. I need to figure out what to talk to my psychologist about on Wednesday. I think I need to talk through my relationships with her.... I don't know what to do...how to go about it etc...... I need to figure out why I want/need a man so much. It can't be healthy I guess. I hate getting my hopes up. Dear god I don't cry over like anything else but men. Just feeling this frustrated makes me kind of teary eyed.....grrrrrrrrr